|Forum: "Something to laugh about 2"
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|Little John|| |
erstellt: 05.07.2006 17:25:21
Little John wants to leave early
The teacher says, "Whoever answers the questions asked first and correctly can leave early today."
Little Johnny says to himself, "Good, I want to get outta here. I'm clever - that answer's mine!"
The teacher asked, "Who said 'Four Score and Seven Years Ago ...'?" Before Johnny could open his mouth, Susie said, "Abraham Lincoln,"
The teacher said, "That's right, Susie, you can go." Johnny was mad. Susie had answered first.
The teacher asked, "Who said, 'I Have a Dream'?" Before Johnny could open his mouth, Mary said, "Martin Luther King." The teacher said,"That's right, Mary, you can go."
Johnny was even madder than before. Mary had answered first.The teacher asked, "Who said 'Ask not, what your country can do for you'?" Before Johnny could open his mouth, Nancy said, "John Kennedy".
The teacher said, "That's right, Nancy, you can go." Johnny was fuming. Nancy had answered first.
As the teacher sat down, Johnny muttered, "I wish these bitches would keep their mouths shut." The shocked teacher asked, "Who said that?" Johnny jumped up and hollered, "Bill Clinton, see you Monday!
|failing memory|| |
erstellt: 05.07.2006 19:31:58
Any Other Name
An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen.
The two elderly gentlemen were talking, and one said, "Last night we went out to a new restaurant, and it was really great. I would recommend it very highly."
The other man said, "What's the name of the restaurant?"
The first man knits his brow in obvious concentration, and finally says to his companion, "Aahh, what is the name of that red flower you give to someone you love?"
His friend replies, "A Carnation?"
"No. No. The other one" the man says.
His friend offers another suggestion, "The Poppy?"
"Nahhhh," growls the man, "You know the one that is red and has thorns."
His friend says, "Do you mean a rose?"
"Yes, Yes that's it. Thank you!" the first man says.
He then turns toward the kitchen and yells, "Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?
erstellt: 07.07.2006 18:37:16
warum drückt ihr euch um Nummer 100???
Also gut, es geht weiter:
As dictated by doctors (3)
The patient was in his usual state of good health until his airplane ran out of gas and crashed.
I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.
Examination reveals a well-developed male lying in bed with his family in no distress.
The patient lives at home with his mother, father, and pet turtle, who is presently enrolled in day care three times a week.
She is numb from her toes down.
Exam of genitalia was completely negative except for the right foot.
While in the emergency room, she was examined, X-rated, and sent home.
The patient suffers from occasional, constant, infrequent headaches.
She will return to me when she wishes to become pregnant.
Type this list of numbers alphabetically
Past history includes puberty and back surgery
To the best of the patient's knowledge, he has never fathered children, nor has his wife.
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